What is Mercy

This is mercy.
The sense of dread is gone.
My shoulders lightened,
And smiling goes deeper than my lips,
Into my thoughts, into my eyes.
The everyday is restored with greeting.

I am looking forward to the usual,
Dusting, sweeping, paying bills.
Grateful thanks I awoke this morning.
No one was dead, no one was screaming.
No person was demanding my time, my decision, my thoughts
Today is mine. And I am happy.

Just a simple prayer. “Jesus, help.”
He did, and has, restored my life:
Because life isn’t always dreams fulfilled or desires obtained,
It is the everyday:
The joy of coffee, raindrops on the windows
And the sun rising,
The anticipation of joy.

copyright penstruck

Moonie the Witch

Moonie the witch is an age-old fable
Told oft at night 'round the dinner table
She could fly like a cloud
She was fearless and bold
She was kindness and light
She was always polite

If you had dinner with Moonie
You would dine on the moon
Table set with star dishes and plenty of spoons
You could sit at the table, put the spoon to the floor
Scope up mounds of cheese
And then dig down more

There were sandwiches filled with Jupiter jam
And fine fish from Neptune, and heavenly ham.
Mercury cakes filled with smooth Saturn rings
And plenty of Marzipan icing the thing.
Volumes of Venus beans, Mars sauce on the side
A table so spread, you are almost cockeyed.
Then dirt cakes from Earth, served in sunny jugs,
And Sweet Pluto pudding filled Uranusing mugs.

You would eat all your able,
At the table with spoons
While the stars changed from dishes
To lights for the room.
And Moonie would smile, and offer you more
So that when you were full, you would lay on the floor.


Then Moonie would move all the tables away
Throw you a pillow
So you could comfortably lay.
While she started the music
Comet Tail Hop and Sway
You would stand up and dance,
Little footsteps sashay
The twirling and rocking were magic, pure fun
And everyone laughed, yes, everyone

When the sun began yawning, and rising for day
She would fill sacks with cakes
You could all take away
Then you would climb on the length of her broom
She would fly you to home and your own soft bedroom
Where you lay down your head
And smile with delight
From the dinner and dancing with Moonie that night

Copyright Penstruck

Dancing on the Path

Is this why I danced?
With daisies in my hair
Wore skirts so short
My cheeks were constant blush
And mothered children:

To slip so quietly into assisted living and oatmeal

The past is paved within me
Roads and rooms so filled with what has been
Built upon the gentle stones of schoolyards and promise
Cemented with ambition and dreams
Sorrows and despair.
There are worlds within me,
My vision shines with them
Alive and touching all that I am
Sinew in my soul, whittled wisdoms in my thoughts.

Such eyes as these should not close
With nothing to remember that the future glides
On my footsteps.

Copyright Penstruck

What does it mean to be a Christian

What does it mean to be a Christian? Christian is an accepted term for a group of religious dominations subscribing to the belief that God sent his Son, Jesus, to live and die so that mankind could be once and for all united with God, beyond the Old Testament law.

So does being a Christian mean that you are a member of a denomination, even a non-denomination? Or does being a Christian mean that you, as an individual, have accepted as indisputable truth the Jesus was born of a virgin, lived, and died to reconcile you to God? And, if you, as an individual, believe and accept this, what is the responsibility of your everyday life?

Does it mean you follow a pre-described set of rules defined by an organized sect of the Christian religion? Or do you follow your heart?

It is good to be taught, and to understand Jesus and God's word. It is good to spend time understanding the sin nature of yourself, and why God had the need to send Jesus to die. You cannot change your nature, but you can ask Jesus to change your nature. And you can act as God would, with love, compassion and patience.

You can, through reading the Bible, prayer, and a devotion of thought life, draw close to God. So that you can ask, in any situation, how you should respond.

You cannot get close to God by following rules designed to define how you should act. Do you think God cares if ladies wear makeup, or men play cards? Only if in doing those things, your character is affected. God is concerned about the character of a person, not the actions. But, but, you say.

BUT think about it. The reason you do something is directly related to your inner man. When your character is aligned with God, you will only WANT to do things that reflect that.

It is simple, really, to be a Christian. Do good, and don't wait for people to praise you for it. It is only you and God. You can be a Democrat, and still be a Christian. You can understand that you are meant to live in the world, and be a light, so you mix with unbelievers, you go to school with them, and you work with them.

As you walk, be a person who lives in the light. People will come to you. Because they will be curious about your peace, your kindness, your excellence in your work, or education.

Homeschooling: Learning to spell

When I was a little kid, somehow, I fell in love with words. I had a best friend, Kathy Schmidt. Her last name was the first word I learned to spell.
I am a smart person. But when I was a kid, I didn't have a filter, you know, the thing that makes you hold back on saying what you really mean. That did create some problems for me growing up. But eventually, I learned to craft words more kindly.
Anyway, Kathy and I were in her house, and her Dad was teaching her to spell her last name. S-C-H-M-I-D-T. It was interesting at first, but Kathy just couldn't get it. Her Dad was very patient, spelling it over, and over, and over. "Oh, comeon, Kathy, schmidt, it's not that hard!" I said.
Her Dad looked at me with real kindness, and said not everyone was a smart as me, and I had to learn to be more patient. I said I was sorry, and I meant it. But it set me to wondering, how smart was I? And more, how could words have such power?

Words are the most powerful tools we have. As parents, our words actually shape the personality, security and self-esteem of our kids. As adults, words affirm, solidify and amuse. Words are powerful, use them with care.

Unschooling: tales of near death and betrayl

I am learning about Unschooling. As I think about the philosophy I found while reading about Unschooling, I thought about all the unschooling that happened to me before I was six. I know the before six part, because my family moved to the suburbs when I was in first grade. The unschooling lessons I learned involved near death experiences and betrayal, as seen through curiously intuitive eyes.

I remember watching the Hallmark Hall of Fame show about a lady who was a pirate or leader of some group. What impressed me was that she jumped from a high tower into a sheet the guys held. This looked really fun and exciting. So, the next day, I talked my girlfriends, Kathy and Peggy, into playing this game.
We went to the back of Peggy's apartment building. We found a screen door. They held it and I went up to the third floor landing and climbed over the rail, prepared for adventure. It was cut short by a neighbor who rushed, screaming, and grabbed me. I was not happy. But later I learned I could have been killed.

Living in the city, hills and trees were fun places to go. My sister had to take me with her and her friends, and we were going to Mud Hill. Mud Hill was two blocks, one busy street and a good hill climb. Then we had to walk across a train trestle to reach Mud Hill. The slats were pretty far apart, and I had short legs. I stepped into the middle of the slat, and my shoe got caught. I didn't know anything about spatial relationship, so I was worried I would be stuck forever. Then I saw the train coming. I screamed "Barbie, Barbie" and other yells. The group turned back. My sister said, "Oh, she always yells like that" and kept walking. I think it was my cousin who finally had pity and saved my life. I wasn't sure I could trust my sister after that.

Now, the big betrayal. One hot afternoon, I took $5.00 from my dad's dresser and bought everyone in the neighborhood an ice cream from the ice cream man. My sister had two fudge bars. Later that day, I was coming up the front steps, and heard my sister telling my mom about how "… and she took money from your dresser and bought everyone ice cream, hump." However, she left out the part about how she ate two, and, even though she was five years older than me, did not try to stop me at all.
I slid against the wall, trying to get to my bedroom unnoticed. It did not work. I got spanked and she got ice cream.

Unschooling happens all the time. Even when kids are traditionally educated.

Unschooling: When did the land of the free become the home of the stupid

I watched a short interview on CNN this afternoon. The host was 'chatting' with a woman who unschooled her children. When asked how her kids would learn things like trigonometry, the woman tried to respond, but couldn't pronounce the word. Then she said if her teenage son wanted to learn it, they would look it up on the Internet.

I have no words.

I write regularly helping parents find ways to motivate and teach their teenagers. And live through the teen years. Parents want kids to stay in school, to graduate and move out. But I found out that as many as 300,000 kids are in the unschool program.

These are the future leaders of our country. That scares me, and I'm fearless.

Christianity today: a simple calling

"Come, and I will make you fishers of men". This is what Jesus said when he called the first disciples, Andrew and Peter. The men left their fishing nets and followed Jesus.

I am amazed at times how far from that moment Christianity have moved. It's no longer "Come", but "come, and do this, and do that, and act this way, and dress that way, and don't do this, and don't do that, and you will learn to be a fisher of men". It seems as if many Christians have assumed the life changing power of Christ, and put very many caveats on accepting Jesus as Lord.

But it's very simple. "Come." Don't worry about your present lifestyle or actions. If you hear the call to "come," just do it. What you will learn is that God is very capable of helping you become the person He wants you to be. What does God want? Honesty, integrity, self-respect, fairness, kindness, goodness and people able to show love. Because God loves us. And we are His mirrors.

Legend has it that Peter was a jerk. He admitted he was a sinful man. Peter also said to Jesus "Where else would we go? You are the Lord." Jesus gave Peter the keys to the kingdom. But not because Peter was so saintly, but because Peter was always the first to believe, and Peter knew that Jesus was Lord.

If God calls to you "Come," let your heart respond. Trust God to teach you, as Jesus taught His disciples. Honestly, you will learn about how Jesus built his disciples faith. Jesus took them out in the boats after they had a long, unsuccessful day of fishing, and filled their nets. Jesus sent them ahead in a boat to the other side of the lake, and then walked out to them. He awoke during a storm when they were afraid and stopped the storm. He fed the thousands from the few loaves and fishes His disciples brought Him. Jesus talked with the disciples daily, answered their questions, and was a living example of the character of God. They knew Him well, and He was whom they desired to be.

Woodstock-Where were you in 1969?

Hey all you old hippies! Saturday, August 15, 2009 is the 40th anniversary of Woodstock.

Where were you in 1969. I was on my way to New York in my little yellow volkswagon. Never made it, the car broke down. I was bummed.

Woodstock was a peaceful, messy, farout music festival. Short on food, water, and clean condtions, hippies remained peaceful and fun-filled. Yeah, some drugged out, most were high, but this was a time when you knew the person next to you had your back.

It was a time before the drug wars, the bikers, and the bad guys. Peace, love, and rock n roll.

I am older now, straight, and a solid citizen. But my heart beats hippie.

The effects of being a Christian

I write articles on Helium. I like the site, there are always interesting titles. There is a Marketplace where I can compete for money, and the opportunity to be published beyond the Internet. I have had some of my poems published, I write at other sites. I, like so many others, am working on a book, and have hopes of eventually supporting myself this way. But in the meantime, I work in accounting. Not a bad profession, not as boring as everyone jokes about.

My brother’s favorite joke: “Did you hear the one about the accountant who walked into a party and was so boring, the other accountants noticed?”

HA!

Today I had an email from a fellow writer on Helium. She stated she was a “happy heathen” and had some objections to my Christian undertones in my article. I was very pleased, actually. I am a Christian, and live my life according to the Word, the Bible. I don’t profess to be perfect, have all the answers, or have “arrived”. I am just a bozo on the bus, but I am a believer, and I am happy. To know that even my “unchristian” writings reflect who I am is a high compliment to me.

I wonder sometimes why people are so offended by Christianity. If they don’t believe in God, Jesus, or any of the principles, why should they care if I do? I don’t mind if they don’t share my beliefs. Some Christians might think that is awful, but I have considered this for a while.

Tell me, as Jesus walked among men, when did He have a screaming match with someone who refused to believe in Him? Well, once at the temple, when the temple courtyard was set up like a marketplace, with people selling sacrificial lambs, holy garments and other articles of prayer and worship, because they had turned the Holy Temple of worship into a place for gain. But, other than that, He lived the life, talked the talk and walked the walk.

Jesus offered hope. I took that hope. I thrive on it. When He met Peter at the dock, Jesus said, “come with me, and I will make you fishers of men”. He kept on walking, and Peter followed. Jesus didn’t beat Peter over the head. Jesus offered life. Peter took it.

Peter is my favorite. He reminds me of myself. Peter stumbled, he fell, and he got back up. He just kept following Jesus.

That’s what I do. When I write, my beliefs come through. That’s what Christianity is about. Passing it forward.

God's Healing

I was shopping at Justice with my 9 year old. Justice is a store for tweens, who want clothing like they see on Hannah Montana. While I was outside the dressing room waiting for the next outfit appearance, I notice a young man with a large child in a stroller.
The little girl was disabled, and started to whine slightly. He soothed her and rocked the stroller back and forth. He was picking out some shirts for her to where, that were age appropriate for a tween. How sweet it was, and my heart was really touched. He was in a store his daughter would love, it she was aware that she was nine or ten. But looking at the child, I could see she would not be the energetic, bouncy girl, like my nine year old.
I have been praying for God to heal this child since I saw her. I continue to pray each day. Because God can. He doesn't need me to lay hands on the child. I hope that the girl is healing even now.
I could tell from the man's demeanour that he loved his daughter. And I want his hopes to be blessed. If you will, please pray for this child.

Trust in the Lord with all your Heart

I had an interesting discussion with a fellow beleiver last night. We were talking about Amy Grant, a pioneer Christian singer who attempted a pop crossover and was unsuccessful. Amy, for reasons I don't know, left her husband, Gary Chapman, and married Vince Gill.
My friend was through scriptures at me about how divorce was sin, and the only reason for divorce is infidelity, or adultery. Divorce is not an unforgivable sin. And there are many reasons people split up.
Sometimes, being married to a particular person is unbearable, maybe they abuse drugs, beat you, or worse. And, it is an individual choice to seperate if there is adultery. Some people work through it, some don't. Infidelity can be emotional. Your spouse could have friendships that invade the intimacy of marriage, and circumvent the confidence one spouse is suppose to have in the other. If the two become one flesh, then there is an emotional leaning that develops.
In Proverbs, Chapter3 verse 5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all you heart, and do not rely on your own insight. In all your ways, acknowledge Hime, and her will make straight your path"
To me, this is a hugh scripture. As a baby boomer, (a nice word for old), I have seen a lot of stuff. One thing I have observed is that people can marry the wrong person. I beleive that God has a path for us, and it includes our mate. I have seen people marry to get children, because the former spouse could not conceive with them. I have seen people marry for lust, for money, or because someone was willing to marry them. My thought is: If God has a path, and we choose another, is God obligated to bless it?
So many people see God as the go-to guy, to get what they want. And God is good, He wants good things for his children. But He also wants obedience and trust. Think about your own children, if you have them. Young children want what they want, and will go to great lengths to get it. The children know the parent loves them, and after obtaining the goal, want the parents support. But the parent was not consulted first, or what the parent said was turned to suit the acquisition of the child's desire.
What I am saying is I don't believe we can walk around shopping and impulse buying, then come to God for His blessing afterwards. The word says "What God has joined together, let no man put asunder". The point here is God joining together.
So what if you come to the conclusion that you have married because you were so hot for the person or what they represented, you couldn't stand it. And here you are, really sorry. What then? Consider Proverbs 3, verse 5-6. Trust in the Lord, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path.

Poetry Techniques

I participate in writing subjects at Helium.com. I am able to exercise my writing skills, and discipline myself to compose information I may not necessarily think of on my own. Part of this writing is rating the other writers. It gives me a chance to see how others are writing, and their views on subjects.

I was reading an essay on Poetry Techniques. It was very long, and very well researched. I was somewhat amazed by the amount of information telling poets how to write. I understand timing, rhyme, false rhyme and certain techniques. I have used them for creative writing projects in college.

But poetry is more than being able to combine words and meter. At least, for me it is. Normally, when I write a poem, it springs from a thought. I have a poem “The Dancer”. This did take a couple of years to write, because what I had for the poem were the last lines “Old woman sits in a chair, Her future recedes”.

This came when I was camping. Relaxing in the sun, I was thinking about life, where it’s going, how it’s going to end up, I ponder a lot. I saw the woman in my mind, rocking on a porch, hands folding in her lap, looking at the trees. How did she get there? All of her life played before her, and she was smiling.

When I write, normally, I hear the rhythm. As I put the thought into words, the computer keyboard becomes a piano, the syllables are notes, the pauses occur in the phrase. I sometimes go over it a few times, but honestly, it more often comes out just the way it sounds. Sometimes, it’s really good. Like my poem WOE. When you read this, you can feel the slow march of the Israelites, the heat, and the despair. The pace increases, and you can feel the joy. This is a really good poem.

I have a dark poem published on Helium. Today its number 236 of 1,337. That’s good. This is one of my stronger poems; I usually don’t publish the dark stuff. There is too much of it out there these days. Sometimes I think today’s poets have a mindset that trouble and discontent are the backbone of poetry. I don’t share that view.

Poetry is a dance, a celebration of life. Life has darkness, but it contains real joy, and fun. I just had a poem on breathing come to mind. Aren’t you glad you can breath? Doesn’t the sun fill you with hope? Misery passes. It really does. Oh, you say, you don’t know about my life! But really, I know about mine. If I told you all the sad and awful things that have happened to me, you’d sit down and be thankful for your life. I once read in a book about the Tree of Sorrows. When the people died, they were allowed to march around the tree with others, and could pick a different life. In the end, they chose their own.

This is a fun poem: WORDS

Never is a big word
Always seems so huge
I stand and face such verbiage
I am thoroughly confused.

Sometimes seems so normal
Maybe is benign
Could be fills with promise
Someday passes time.

What about the real words
Like yes and no and do?
Could be sometime someday
Maybe always never, too.


This is the dark poem APPARITION

You are an apparition.
Whispering worthy words into my ear
Wooing me with woeful tales of regret
Leading me to your persuasive prison
Where it is cold and dark
And no love lives.

Cold hearts, I know them well.
They cast their spell
And stand inside their walls
Believing they can live
Without touching
And have without holding
All the while, their hearts are molding
And dying, and they are deceived.

But they can’t care,
Because their delight is like night
And their smiles are darkness
Eyes filled with promise and deceit
They live in heat
That burns and kills the sweetness

Then suddenly, they are surprised
By death.